101 Witty Paladin Sayings

[Kell]

101 Witty Paladin Sayings

EVERY day is judgement day!
You! Yes, you! The bony thing! Die!
And now, judgement!
The day your sins rise against you is at hand!
The cherry blossom falls upon the soil; the sword falls upon the foe.
Come out and fight foul spawn of the underworld.
I challenge you in the name of Tyr, God of Justice!
Die creatures of darkness!
I am _ I will right wrongs and triumph over evil; and that means you!
Die, head-in-the-clouds!
Come eat cold steel, things of the underworld!
Throw down your swords and prepare to be judged!
Drain this, fang-boy!
Hey, ugly, green, and terminally unwashed! Come here and fight like a man!
SPOON! - Not in the face! Not in the face!
Ad majorem dei gloriam. - For the greater glory of god
Go bleach your roots, creep!
It's a great day to be a Paladin.
Get some!
Punish or be punished.
Hey, foul villains! Knock off all that evil!
The first step in making friends is not to eat people.
Evildoers! Eat my Justice!
Avaunt foul fiendish thingy!
Un-tentacle that fair ingenue!
Eat my shorts, dark spawn of fat women!
Your shoes are untied!
Evil doers beware!
I've come to demand the surrender of Hell!
There can't be more than 50 of them, I won't be hurt!
To have the courage for fighting means to have the courage for victory!
Within our quest we are invincible.
Prepare to meet thy highest judge.
Thy soul be blessed and thy sins forgiven.
You ____ infidel!
-heretic
-mongrel
-cur
-cad
-villain
-slime
Prepare to feel the Wrath of all that is good, Hell Spawn!
Evil always turns in on itself - Justice shall prevail!
For God and country!
All that is good and holy, aid me now as I confront this vile evil!
Prepare to atone for your sins!
Renounce your foul deeds now and I shall spare you.
I claim this land for all that is good, leave now and I shall not destroy you.
Repent now or spend your after life in eternal damnation.
With Justice <insert favorite deity> judges and makes war upon the foul and unrighteous!
<insert favorite deity> has deemed you unworthy - I am his/her sword hand. Prepare to meet damnation.
When Evil walks abroad, I must confront it.
May my sword do my God's will!
Prepare to make your maker!
I am prepared to meet my maker, are you?
With my dying breath I shall continue to remove the tarnish of your shadow from this world!
Summon your faith! It shall make us strong in the face of this obscene evil!
The courage of one can change the destiny of many.
Prepare to feel the iron gauntlet of Tyr the Evenhanded!
Surrender, cowardly followers of evil!
I'm gonna KICK your sorry ass!
DOOM!
I am Ergol the magnificent:
small in stature, large in power,
narrow of purpose, and wide of vision.
I have the power to make your piss turn blue!
While unsheathing sword: Let me introduce you to a friend of mine...
(with a look of boredom and frustration) More <enemy type>! Gods, and I just finished cleaning up from the last bunch!
Can you, like, surrender NOW or something?
DDIIIIIIEEEEEEE!
DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE!
Don't MAKE me come over there after you!
Surrender now or face me!..
no, no... Give up now and I mean it!...
no....You still have a chance to surr? (finishes his charge and attacks), oh, never mind.
(If fighting some beautiful enemy) Back foul temptress! Even though thine image dost set my loins afire, I shall not be deterred from my task!
while attacking: ?OUCH! Now that's GOTTA hurt!'
So, come here often?
OH YEAH, want some more, do ya. Come and get it, and get it. YEAH! Hey, I got some for you too! Here ya go. Feels good, don't it?
Just a flesh wound.
Fight, fight, fight. That's all I do around here. Day-in, day-out.
Bash this, slice that, castrate whatever. How come I don't get to any of the fun stuff?
(after battle) ...That's it?'
Has anyone seen my sword? (amidst piles of bodies)
Whoa, lookit the gash on that one!
Well, I don't know about y'all, but I could use a drink.
If you kill me, I will only become more powerful!
I am not a coward, but it is not fitting for me to get my suit of armor dirty, I gotta be an example to the kids!
(After defeating but not dispatching...) Remember, no matter where you go, or how powerful you become, there will always be someone out there mightier than you. And that someone is me.
Let me convince you of the error of your ways.
Tell me if this hurts.
This is your ticket to the afterlife.
(talking to his sword) ?Here's the goblin I promised you.
It wouldn't be proper for me to put this back without killing SOMETHING!
Try not to bleed all over my boots.
You demons are all alike... blah, blah, blah.
Why am I not worried?
(To the undead...) You won't be so lucky this time.
Save your diseases for the less righteous.
Looks like you've lost a few fights in your day.
God befriend us, as our cause is just!
(after a brawl to opponent) Here are your teeth...
Ahhh c'mon it's not so bad... It's just the Abyss
(to a demon) You are one ugly motherf***
(to the tune of the Ride of the Valkyrie) Fight for justice, Kill For Truth, SLAY ALL EVIL, ta t-t-taaaa
Nighty-night, zombies!
All right boys, let's dance!
Start prayin', boy, and you better pray real good.
You had better watch your manners, demon, or I'll give one hell of a wedgie!
...and you shall know that I am the Lord when I strike upon thee with great vengeance...
Doomsday is near; die all, die merrily!
Say thy prayers, and farewell.



I hate paladins...

[Heretic115]

the saying are witty, the majority of them, but Izgahd and i would both like to second kell's final statement.

[Aurora Damodred]

Daemon would have to agree with you on that one. From the examples she has seen of paladins so far on Dasaria, they are ill tempered, lack wit, drink to much, dont bath, are rude, obnoxious, holier than thou, and did I say Ill tempered? I mean, you slay one person just out of fun and they are all over you like white on pristine snow. Sheesh, they need to change their concept of fun. Daemon noticed two paladins today, I wont mention their names (Mel and Justin) standing next to a tree in Daris drinking spirits (or some other liquor), making a ruckus, and generally causing the guards to become sick from sheer smell alone. What is this world coming to?

[whiteguyinblues]

I hate paladins...............dang someone already said it!

[Kurich e'Marduk]

You! Yes, you! The bony thing! Die!
Hey, foul villains! Knock off all that evil!

These two are the best.

I LOVE this thread!

[Jerio Caine]

Can you, like, surrender NOW or something?

I'd love to see Meldvion shout that out

And ummm... I think Justin is a Warriorpriest or sumtin'.

//Davo

[Aurora Damodred]

Oh, is he? I was under the impression that he was a bad tempered paladin. Warrior-priest, paladin, not much difference anyways if you think about it.

[Jerio Caine]

Well... Justin is Varanite... *Grins wickedly*

//Davo

[Aurora Damodred]

O ho ho, now that has some possibilities. Is there a story bio posted for him that you've seen? Im surprised he gets such a nice welcome in Daris.

[Jerio Caine]

I think it was in his Bio...

//Davo

[Meldvion]

"I've come to demand the surrender of Hell!"

It's funny because it's true and I wasn't drinking, that was only Justin. *Mutters* We never get any respect.

Shakes his head and goes of to smite some evil.

[Hailfall]

O ho ho, now that has some possibilities. Is there a story bio posted for him that you've seen? Im surprised he gets such a nice welcome in Daris.

darling he didn't got a nice welcome in Daris.. at least.. not from me...

*chuckles*

[Feral]

I think the most used quote on Dasaria from Paladins would be :-
"I AM a Paladin Dammit!!!"



Oh yeah, Kin hates em too.

[Kell]

"I AM a Paladin Dammit!!!"

[Zenthrax]

You! Yes, you! The bony thing! Die!

Imagineme saying this hehe...