How to Spam a Gaming Forum

Post by **jhr4n** » Thu Oct 09, 2003 3:21 pm

How to Spam a Gaming Forum
By Archfiend

1) No matter how much u spam, always deny that you were actually spamming. Just because you created 30 threads in 3 minutes does not mean you were spamming unless you agree that you were.

2) When your spam is deleted, become outraged. Spam more, curse the moderators, be a jerk. Go ballistic. Scream about freedom of speech. Nothing shows how out of line the people banning u are like pissing off everyone else in the forums and being a pain in the @ss.

3) Also it is very important to pick a particular mod to blame although it's pretty much impossible to know which mod deleted you unless they tell you. That allows you to put a face on things. For example "if that B@stard Mod A wasn't around the forums would be fine but he keeps deleting me." Also say that particular mod had you banned for disagreeing with him or her because that sounds a lot better than saying "Yeah I got banned for making 800 stupid posts in 3 days"

4) When the forum admin eventually bans your IP make sure to call him a dirty, rotten, no good, arrogant, son of b*tch. Tell everyone how much you hate whatever gaming forum you are in and everyone in it, imparticularly the mods and the forum admin. Tell them how much u hate the game and how (fill in the blank) game A, game B, or game C is going to be "so much better than this game". Try to show everyone how clever you are for getting around the ban by posting at a friends..uh..well ok I should be more realistic here..from a nearby library to show everyone how the forum admin can't push you around. It's also important to encourage everyone you know to quit the game because it sucks.

5) Despite the fact that you hate the game and everyone in it, it is very important to hang around and try to post in the forums as much as possible. Then it's also important to go to other boards and complain about how you got deleted from the game forums.

6) It's also a good idea to start your own forums where freedom of speech rules! Next you need to of course appoint your own mods and forbid spamming (for God's sake look how crappy it's making the general forums of the game you got banned from). Then talk incessantly about how much the other games forums suck and plan out spamming raids on the forums you were kicked off of.

7) Eventually your board will dry up because only a few idiots want to talk to spammers and hear people b*tch all day long. Then go back to the forums you were banned from and complain and spam more (this complaining and spamming will be pretty much indistinguishable from your normal spamming and complaining). Spam and b*tching ratios up 25%, that should teach them!

8) After you get tired of being deleted for the 40th time that day. Make a "reconciliation post". Say something like "although the forum admin is a jerk and I hate all the mods I have a right to. I wasn't deleted for any good reason so you guys should let the past be the past and let me post normally again". It's always a nice touch to talk about the past like it was 5 years ago when in reality you were spamming the forums less than 24 hours ago. Also you get extra points for threatening to "really spam the forums" if you don't get reinstated.

9) If anyone of the regular forum posters get tired of your spamming and never ending, whiney, b*tching for God's sake don't take the time to consider how right they may be! Make sure to either make a 1 sentence response to their posts like 1) you are a moron 2) you are an idiot or my personal favorite 3) You just don't understand. The key thing to remember is that you are the center of the universe and nothing matters but what you want. All these mods, other posters, and even the forum admin himself are just electronic figments of your imagination. If they get pissed off and tired of hearing you complain and spam it doesn't matter. Remember all other people online exist simply for your amusement!!!

10) This is the secret 10th commandment. This is key to being an uber-spammer, the most important key that will put you over the top and take you down the path to enlightenment. I have two words for you..bathtub radio. That's right, get in the bathtub, plug it in, turn it on and drop it in with you and fry like a...ehr..I mean check out the groovy tunes underwater! Ok, actually the key is to stop spamming and start acting like a semi-normal human being instead maladjusted loser but that's not quite as flashy as "bathtub radio" and you know how people love flash =)

Commander James · Post by **Commander James** » Thu Oct 09, 2003 4:26 pm

Good one.

Now, if we could get griefers to do the same, the world would be a much better place.

Boon · Post by **Boon** » Thu Oct 09, 2003 5:44 pm

'Ksher wrote:Yeah.. well.. spam *can* be funny

Yeah compressed meat in a can, can be a bit funny. *Slaps forehead* Oooh...I get it.

Gomezaka · Post by **Gomezaka** » Fri Oct 10, 2003 2:56 pm

Hahaha. This was great. I have seen this many times. Have to save this

Sol Ano · Post by **Sol Ano** » Fri Oct 10, 2003 8:19 pm

*looks confused*

did I miss something? Who are we talking about?

Sally Adams · Post by **Sally Adams** » Fri Oct 10, 2003 9:04 pm

I don't understand?

Valgun · Post by **Valgun** » Tue Oct 14, 2003 8:04 am

Lol very funny Jhr4n, seems like you havent lost your sense of humour

Nice one

DM Agony · Post by **DM Agony** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 3:12 pm

Classic, I declare!

Muletang · Post by **Muletang** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 6:19 pm

hehe, a worthy dredge from the archives.

Redder · Post by **Redder** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 6:30 pm

Oh no! more spam...

Evelond Formos · Post by **Evelond Formos** » Fri Aug 19, 2005 4:06 pm

Crimson Knightmare · Post by **Crimson Knightmare** » Mon Aug 22, 2005 5:10 am

http://www.dasaria.net/phpbb2/viewtopic.php?t=7909

Spam? Hehe

Stonehammer · Post by **Stonehammer** » Mon Aug 22, 2005 8:23 am

Rowan - make sure you read this one.